A Mini Year-In-Review

I haven't been able to blog in a while.

While this inactivity can be attributed to the computer problems that I've had for
the last month, I can actually attribute my inactivity to sloth, which is inexcusable.

But I digress. It's a new year, and I believe that new opportunities are ahead for
me, as long as I keep my eyes toward the heavens.

I don't know if I want to waste energy by putting 2011 in review. I could have done that about three or four years ago. But I just want to enjoy the good moments in life now.

I believe that the most memorable event that occured happened to me in 2011 would be my baptism at Vintage 21 in July. Nothing can top the importance of that, but switching churches, volunteering at the Reality Center and actually growing in my faith in Christ would also count as positive life developments .

I didn't do anything of note professionally. There's a reason for that. I admit I gave up searching for a suitable job for a while. I'm still looking, but now my priority is applying to seminary. I'm applying to Southeastern Baptist Theological Seminary close by and maybe Wesley in Washington D.C..

I'm happiest on Sunday mornings, and I think I am finally being called to serve God in some capacity of ministry.

But my biggest personal New Year's Revolution would be to work harder.

Making Peace With Methodist

On October 22, I decided to rev up the 1997 Ford Explorer to go to Methodist University's Homecoming football game. I looked forward to this day for weeks beforehand. For some twisted reason I always look forward to returning to the land of the Green and Gold.

I kept taking jabs at MU (and Fayetteville in general) in mediums such as these until I got saved in October 2009. Since then I've made a conscious effort to not even talk about the university or bash it, and Methodist has made some vast improvements to its overall atmosphere.

Dr. Ben Hancock is in his first full year there, and he's already cleaned up the residence halls, developed some great future plans for the school, and put on a public relations blitz towards the alumni. A nursing program was also pushed through, and it's added 160 new students, about 85 percent of that being female. The male-to-female ratio has improved to around 60 to 40. And the school's really beginning to grow in size.

I was able to see these things again, and I was also able to see a number of people that I went to class with, hung around with, and partied with. Most of them have jobs or are in graduate school. It seems like half of them are starting families, as well.

Later on I settled in with a few friends of mine, and we went downtown for dinner and drink. I eventually wound up at DM's Sports Bar (formerly Double Bogey's) which wasn't all that impressive in hindsight. Methodist students have switched college bars several times in the last several years, and apparently they have gone full circle to DM's after souring on Last Call and being banished from Izzy's. It was more of the same stuff that I got used to at Methodist: the male-to-female ratio was 90-to-10, and belligerence was at a high level. The nursing program did not exist at that moment.

Despite this reality, I think Methodist is on the up and up, and I really do feel that the students are happy. There are still some issues, most notably overcrowding and retention numbers.

Seriously, if you if you cut the number of freshman football players from 130 to 40 or 50, you'd lose a little money but eliminate the bulk of your retention issues. But give Dr. Hancock time to tweak some things. He hasn't begun the cleanup process yet.

In fact, if the Dr. is reading this now, I'd like to finish by asking him this...

When I was a student, I believed that the main issues of the university were a lopsided male to female ratio and retention. Do you believe that these are still issues? If so, what are you going to do about it?

We are MU.

Confessions, Part 3: More Love, and Such

About a month ago, I ranted about my love life. Or lack of it. I've had a chance to cool off, so once again this may be a underwhelming article...

But yeah, the idea of entering a relationship....aaahhh. It's harder than I thought. I honestly, honestly believe that the odds are 50/50 that I'll find myself in a relationship in my lifetime.

Then again, I've been commanded to wait, so I have little choice but to wait. And slow the process down. And so on, and so on.

One more thing....You won't see me on these dating websites anymore. I've flirted with them, and let me tell you..I almost puked. That would have been a sight.

Happy trails.

Confessions, Part II:Love

Love is the easiest and the hardest thing I've had to comprehend in my life.

On one hand, I find it easier than ever to love someone in the context of the Golden Rule. It's easier for me to love someone as Christ loved someone. The feeling of giving and recieving love has been very rewarding for me.

There's also been the other part of love-that is, searching for, finding, and enjoying a romantic relationship. That's been really hard.

First of all, there's this thing called Asperger's Syndrome that I have, as well as all the stigmas that come along with it (limited social skills, hardcore quirkiness, etc.) I've also had to go through years of un-learning weird behaviors and the player-type mentality that I learned at Methodist. Heck, I don't think I would have been a good boyfriend to anyone at any period of my life until the light went on this summer.

And there's also the attraction factor. In my past life I would only go after people that I had a physical attraction to. I didn't really know what I wanted in a partner. Today I tend to seek believers that are low-maintence, really into some form of social justice, and artistic in some way. I haven't found her yet. :(

I also tend to face a lot of competition for some of the girls I pursue. I guess I would be dropping hints on my type here, but I think I wouldn't be single right now if I dated some of the people that society tells me to date. I am somehow wired this way, and I am clueless why.

Don't even get me started on the financial deal. Love is..love.

I'm going to continue later.

Confessions, Part 1:The Battle with Ego.

My ego sucks.

Sports Biz Wish List

1. It's a month old, but if you haven't read Bill Simmons' plan on how to fix the National Basketball Association recently, go back to this archive and do it. Here's the link below (if I can upload it....)

The only thing that really teed me off was his insistence that the town of Charlotte, North Carolina couldn't support an NBA franchise. Hogwash! The Charlotte Hornets sold out 358 consecutive games in their heyday!!!! I know Charlotte's banking industry and unemployment rate sucks, but don't trash them just yet!! I wish they would just merge the Hornets and Bobcats and go back to 29 teams (the NBA operated at that number for 8 or 9 years). Charlotte would get the Hornets back then.

I would also move the Grizzlies back to Vancouver, move Milwaukee to Chicago and move Sacramento to Anaheim. That would solve the small-market issue (kinda). Or if you want to keep 30 NBA franchises, move the Bobcats to Seattle and let Charlotte have its Hornets back. Also, I'd split the revenue 50/50 between players and owners. Bet that won't happen.

2.I wish they would make a decision on the NHL's Phoenix Coyotes and move on.

3.As for the failed NHL Sun Belt experiment-I think it is logical to have the Kings, Ducks, and Sharks around, as well as the Stars, due to their presence in large U.S. TV markets. People do not count Florida as a southern state, so I guess you could keep Florida and Tampa Bay. I live in the Triangle, and there are a lot of educated Yankees here. Keep Carolina, on pure bias, because I am a Hurricanes fan. Nashville survived their relocation trial in 2007. Otherwise, ice everybody else, although I'd ship Phoenix to Winnipeg instead of Atlanta due to market size.

4.If an NFL team ever comes to Los Angeles, the only logical candidates that I would like to move would be the Rams, Raiders, and Chargers, due to their past history with the city.

5.I hope Division III colleges quit cattle call recruiting for football and only enlist student-athletes that can survive in the classroom and could legitimately contribute to their football teams. This has teed me off for five-plus years now.

Peace now..

from a washed up night owl....

I am twenty-seven years old.

And I've lived long enough to say that I can fortunately-or unfortunately-say that I've had a lot of experience with dance clubs and the like.

As a Christian, and as a twenty-seven year old male with things to actually lose these days, I'm finally becoming a stubborn bull about what places and clubs I'll go to. What amazes me is the sheer fact that a 21-year old Remille would be shocked with the caution of a twenty-seven-old Remille. To be honest, Remille at 21 would go wherever the girls were.

I think it's safe to say that you won't be seeing me at any hip-hop dance clubs where a lost soul would kill me with a .45 or where I would have to look at seeing frat boys in Polo's, sorority girls who haven't matured on the inside, or G.I.'s who may fall into a trap marriage. I could never compete in an environment where testosterone or hormones were heavily emphasized. I can't start now.

I don't want to be spotted where my friend Kendal Kinlaw (who is pretty cool, by the way) wouldn't be caught dead at. This disqualifies about 65% of Franklin Street, i.e. East End, Players, La Residence, Pantana Bob's, etc. This is why Durham is more ideal for me, because you don't have these joints clogging up the place.

Kildare's, however, actually does have good karaoke nights on Tuesdays, and karaoke is more up my alley. I do like to go to the dance parties that places like the Pinhook, Kings, or the Station throw; they aren't really hormonal and the objective there is to have a good time.

That's my two cents.

mercy

Kendrick Vinar preached a great sermon a week or two ago on the subject of mercy triumphing over judgement.

What stood out was the comment about the total lack of good guys and bad guys in God's eyes. He loves us all equally. In His universe, the spectacle of Cowboys vs. Redskins, Protestants vs. Catholics, Caucasians vs. African Americans, that kind of thing.

Of course, Kendrick also stated that are three main reasons why people find themselves behind the eight-ball...Social injustice (imho, one of the reasons why several minorities and poor Caucasians struggle today), natural disaster (e.g. the recent tornadoes), and personal sin.

I see all three of these plights, in some fashion, at my job. I won't go into detail about exactly how I notice these things. But I see them and I want them to receive God's mercy.

I do not feel that us human beings (non-believers and even some believers) who live in the Triangle do a good enough job of showing mercy towards those that seem different from them or less affluent than them. It's human nature to stereotype and run away from them.

Think about this: How would Jesus see the poor, the black, the Hispanic, the socially inept? Would He shoo them away???

Let us love each other.

year in review

My one-year anniversary in the Triangle may or may not be celebrated in a week. It all depends on what my mood is at the time. Stay tuned.

The prognosticators (I believe that me and God are the only ones in this case) would call this move a rip-roaring success. So it's pro and con time.

Pros:
I've made a remarkable amount of progress in my walk with God. I've met some amazing people.
And there's so much to do around here.
I have really grown as a person.
I've found a career direction.

Cons:
I haven't found a legitimate job here yet. This is going to become a legitimate issue. I wonder sometimes if I'm ever going to crack the good old boy wall here.
I can't get a date in this area. ;) People here don't seem to like socially awkward folk like myself.
It matters a bit too much where you went to school and what you do for a living..whoops, I'm being nitpicky...I would say that the pros strongly outweigh the cons.
I just hope I can stay here for a little while longer.

why I don't listen to mainstream music...

I don't listen to a lot of mainstream music. And I don't listen to a lot of mainstream rap.

Don't get me wrong. I consider rap as a secondary listening pleasure. But I'm not going to listen to songs that degrade African-Americans and contain lyrics that glorify sex, violence, the importance of money above everything else, and Satanism.

Yes, Satanism.

Some of you may have heard of the Illuminati before (fyi, they are a secret society that allegedly controls most, if not all, of the major media and music outlets of the world, among other things). Some would debate their existence, but I'm not going to argue this here.

Instead, I'm going to pass on some YouTube links that argue that most mainstream music are full of Satanic references and hints toward the New World Order/Endtimes theory. It's 13 parts long, so I would get a snack and click on the link when it says "To Be Continued"..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DikoLMfmEge

if that doesn't work, go to YouTube and search for the The Music Industry Exposed....Look it up for yourself

The validity of this can be debated. But if you ever read the book of Revelation, you would find this easier to believe...

twice-a-week edict

From here on in, I intend to keep myself sharp by posting on here at LEAST twice a month, if not more...I'm being pushed to the brink recently.

My V-Day Letter (Belated) to America-Why I'm Single

I've been gone for a month. It's because I've having a great time with with life. Work is kinda back and forth, but I understand the joy of having a vision, now, because I am the steward of one. Church is good. My truck lives. I live.

Then I come across the Golden Child known as V-Day. I saw the kids at the RC celebrate today, running around the halls with all their abundant joy. I had to fight the notion to say in my heart that Valentine's was irrelevant. But I've never really embraced it.

I'm single. Flaming single. I have been in this state for all my life. sans two weeks. Laugh if you will. Why, you ask?? I could blame Fayettenam for my issue. I was overshadowed in college by golfers, athletes, the 9 to 1 male to female ratio and my own taste for beer. After I got out, I found myself overshadowed by the looming shadow of Fort Bragg. Eek!

And then there's the game issue. Laughing out loud. Haha.

And I'm pretty fickle when it comes to women. I've developed high standards. That disqualifies me from part of the population. If I'm not crazy about a girl, why go through it? The tempation of infidelity would loom larger...

Heck, marriage and valentines and all that jazz may never be in the cards for me. It's possible. I don't think that settling for less than the best isn't ideal!

Don't forget, Paul was single for the duration of his life. So was my good buddy Jesus ;).

So I hopefully have explained why I'm single. I did it all for you.

asperger's part 2: continued education

I've done some research on Asperger's syndrome over the past month (before the holidays distracted me) and I've tried to relate what I've found to what I've gone through in my life. I've mentioned some symptoms in part one, but I've just wanted to highlight some things that I relate to:

-Having a narrow set of interests in life

I fall into that category; I tend to narrow down my primary interests to sports, music that people of my shade of skin color wouldn't dare admit to being interested in, writing, and other things. If you try and ask me about something I don't care about, or if you ask about something that I care about but had just started following, you would run circles around me. Nowadays, I wouldn't care about what other people think about my interests, but at one time I hid them (or edited them in conversation) because I wanted to be liked.

-Social awkardness

Asperger's victims have trouble with eye contact, small talk, and generally keeping a good conversation with people. They have trouble with figuring out sarcasm, jokes, and the like. Personally, I've improved with social awkardness, but sometimes the sarcasm park still gets me.

-Worrying

This is something that Christians shouldn't do a lot of, but Aspies have a high tendency to both worry and keep their feelings inside. I sometimes worry, unfortunately.

-Bad body language in social situations

This is a difficult thing for Aspies to deal with and it certainly doesn't help you socially.

-Being too trusting of people

-Difficulty with dating and relationships

This is a separate column all together......

And so on..

In Part 3, I'll speak about illusions about Asperger's Syndrome.

new year's revolution

I'm going to return to my Asperger's Syndrome series (after being derailed by the holidays) but I'd like to share my New Year's Resolution.

(drumroll)

It's to simply mature as a person in Christ and grow into someone that could handle a better job, a career, a relationship, and everything that God has in store for me, in time.

God bless.